Stolen from some ...

Stolen from some random journal...f a c t s01. name: Veronica02. single or taken: Taken 03. sex: Girl04. birthday: April 11, 1984 06. siblings: One older brother and two older sisters07. hair color: Dark brown08. eye color: Dark brown09. shoe size: 9 - yuck, big feet!10. height: 5'4 & 3/4"- when I don't slouchr e l a t i o n s h i p s1. who are your best friends?: Jeffrey and Cindy (forever)! I miss Sonia and Kaelsie (back in the day)2. do you have a boyfriend/girlfriend?: Yes, Jefff a s h i o n | s t u f f1. where is your favorite place to shop: Ebay! Urban Outfitters, Target, Delia's and I'm starting to really like the Gap - so is Jeff...*sigh* I'm definitely in my twenties.2. any tattoos or piercings: No way. Tattoos are gross, but I did get one extra hole in my right ear in 9th grade. I'm pretty sure it closed up.s p e c i f i c s1. do you do drugs?: No2. what kind of shampoo do you use?: Fructis, but I switched to Thermasilk recently.3. what are you most scared of?: Being lonely and being made fun of5. who is the last person that called you?: Jeffrey6. where do you want to get married?: It used to be outside in Arkansas, but no way. I want to get married in a beautiful Chapel, either in Savannah, GA or Miami (maybe)7. how many buddies are online right now?: I have no idea. Probably two.8. what would you change about yourself?: My stupid fears and worries.f a v o r i t e s1. colors: Red and black. But recently, dark rose and turquoise.2. foods: Pollo a la brasa (Peruvian), yuca frita3. boys names: none 4. girls names: I have only one, but I don't want to tell anyone.5. subjects in school: Film, Art, Film Art, Literature 6. animals: Sloths!!! 7. sports to watch: Hockeyh a v e | y o u | e v e r1. given anyone a bath?: Hehe, yeah2. smoked?: Cigarettes? Yes3. bungee jumped?: No way4. made yourself throw up?: Gosh...maybe...I can't remember if I suceeded or not 5. skinny dipped?: I don't think so.6: ever been in love?: Yes7. made yourself cry to get out of trouble?: Haha! Yes8. pictured your crush naked?: Yes9. actually seen your crush naked?: Yes 10. cried when someone died?: Yes11. lied: Yes12. fallen for your best friend?: No, that'd be gay13. been rejected? Yes14. rejected someone?: Yes15. used someone?: No16. done something you regret?: Not really, but sometimes I feel like I doc u r r e n tclothes: What I'm wearing right now? PJ's- Black Crescent Fresh shirt and shorts with a felt duck on themmusic: The Faint (blank wave arcade), Scissor Mommy (must order CD), Blue Ribbon (must find cd), Jeff Buckleymake-up: Noneannoyance: People that look like animals. People that act like animals.smell: Jeff's cologne and even more his sweat.favorite band: A.R.E. Weapons and Fischerspooner desktop picture: On this one I'm using, a picture of the three nephews book you're reading: Dammit, I was reading Sense and Sensibilty- LAME, but I do want to finish it. I have to read The Thief of Always because it's Jeff's favorite book and Jeff read The Giver which is my favorite book. in cd player: In car- Squarepusher, but I listen to The Faint while going to school. Depeche Mode in the stereo in my rooml a s t | p e r s o nyou touched: My momhugged: My mom...or dad...I can't rememberyou imed: Cindy, last night you yelled at: My dada r e | y o uunderstanding: Yesopen-minded: Yesarrogant: Noinsecure: Yesinteresting: I think sorandom: What?hungry: Not reallysmart: For certain thingsmoody: Yeshard working: Not lately organized: Not latelyhealthy: I hope soshy: Sometimes, depends on the circumstancesbored easily: Not reallymessy: A littleresponsible: I was, I don't know what happened to me this year obsessed: Yes angry: Sometimesw h o | d o | y o u | w a n n akill: Every celebrity in the media (actos, musician, etc.)slap: The people who are obsessed with these celebritiesget really wasted with: Jeffrey, but he gets sleepy too fast. So I guess my friendsget high with: No onelook like: Winnie Cooper since kindergarden up until now! And she doesn't even look the way she did when she was younger! Oh shit, I'm slow, I just re-read the question. I thought it was aking me who do people always say I look like. Oh hell, I don't care to look like anyone.talk to offline: Meh?talk to online: I hate talking onliner a n d o min the morning i am: Sleepylove is: The most wonderful thing everi dream about: Random things happening in my lifeo p p o s i t e | s e xwhat do you notice first: Personalitylast person you slow danced with: Whoa...no one. Slow danced?makes you laugh the most: Jeffrey makes you smile: Jeffreywho do you have a crush on: Jeff who has a crush on you: Jeffd o | y o u | e v e rsit on the internet all night waiting for that someone special to im you?: It used to be Jeff but we gave the internet the finger! Fuck the internet.wish you were a member of the opposite sex?: Yes wish you were younger: Sometimescried because someone said something to you?: YesN u m b e rof times i have had my heart broken: Onceof hearts i have broken: Probably one, of the ones that meant anythingof continents i have lived in: Oneof tight friends: Twoof cds i own: Lotsof scars on my body: Quite a few I guess, but none too noticeable Hi, to the two or three people who read my journal. Please take this survey thingy, copy and paste it under 'comments' and fill it out with your own responses. I'm really bored, and for those in Miami, I'm sure you are bored too. Let's keep each other busy while we wait for Frances.

DisorderRatingPar...

DisorderRatingParanoid:ModerateSchizoid:ModerateSchizotypal:ModerateAntisocial:LowBorderline:LowHistrionic:ModerateNarcissistic:LowAvoidant:HighDependent:HighObsessive-Compulsive:Moderate-- Personality Disorder Test - Take It! --Whoa...I would've thought my Antisocial rating would be high, but what I considered anti-social behavior is not that at all (see here). Actually, what I have is an Avoidant* personality! Yeah, that's me. Absolutely! And dependent**, yeah I can see that...ever since I moved in with Jeffrey.This is silly. I rarely take these quizzy things. I can't sleep! Jeff's coming tonight...EEP! He said he couldn't sleep either so he got into his car and left Savannah. Yay! YAY!!! I'm nervous.*AvoidantAvoidant personality disorder is characterized by extreme social anxiety. People with this disorder often feel inadequate, avoid social situations, and seek out jobs with little contact with others. They are fearful of being rejected and worry about embarassing themselves in front of others. They exaggerate the potential difficulties of new situations to rationalize avoiding them. Often, they will create fantasy worlds to substitute for the real one. Unlike schizoid personality disorder, avoidant people yearn for social relations yet feel they are unable to obtain them. They are frequently depressed and have low self-confidence.**DependentDependent personality disorder is characterized by a need to be taken care of. People with this disorder tend to cling to people and fear losing them. They may become suicidal when a break-up is imminent. They tend to let others make important decisions for them and often jump from relationship to relationship. They often remain in abusive relationships. They are overly sensitive to disapproval. They often feel helpless and depressed.

I alway...

I always freeze up when I go into Blockbuster, any Blockbuster. There are so many movies to pick from, I'm always afraid of picking the wrong one. It's weird, I know.While I was waiting for the clerk to load up my account history on his computer he shouted "SMILE!" It scared me! I told him I was tired, but really my mind was just somewhere else, I guess. As I was leaving Blockbuster I could hear Aphex Twin playing loudly in someone's car. I stared at the car for the longest time, but could not see anyone through the tinted windows. What was I waiting for? I guess I was expecting that person to roll down their window so I could give them the Aphex Twin nod of approval. No, not really. But it did reassure my feelings about living in Miami.I miss Jeff more than anything right now. All I want is him. I need him. I'm not the same without him. When I'm with him I'm happier and more social and most importantly, I never have to go to Blockbuster.

New background?

This pa...

This past week I've been cleaning my room and throwing things out. Today as I arranged all my shoes I realized I have over 25 pairs of shoes. I thought I had about 5 or something, but that's because those are the only pairs I ever wear! Needless to say, half of them I'm going to have to sell. I can't wait until Jeff returns, I really need his camera. Yay for meaningless posts!By the way- I made my last post private because I thought it was too personal. So whoever got a chance to read it you can comment on it if you like. I will put it back up again soon, most likely towards the end of August or whenever things clear up... He's hot! *lickies* :9Oh, and here are some pictures he edited-

UPDATE: FUCK YOU FRIENDS ONLY POSTS!!!

Okay...me and Jeff have been having some problems this past year. He has changed A LOT this year. He has matured and I see now that he cares about me a hell of a lot more than he used to. Before we moved in together everything was okay and we loved each other and missed each other always, but I always knew I was in love with him more than he was with me. I mean, he loved me but I'm not too sure if he was in love with me or not. Last summer things happened and I became very insecure. Now one year later, I'm so happy everything that happened this year happened because it made me grow up a little more and open my eyes. I'm not a shy piece of crap anymore. I realize I have a voice. I don't care about what others think of me. I hate sweaters now, well sometimes I still wear my black cardigan. Anyway, my point is I've opened up a lot this past year and I have Jeff to thank for that. He made me open my eyes and become more aware of everything around me. However, I confess that I still have some insecurities concerning our relationship. I trust him, but stupid bad memories keep getting in the way of our happiness. Sometimes we'll be happy for days and then I mess it up because I say something hurtful to him. He's endured this for the past year and recently I see that it's not fair that I keep torturing him like this anymore. But I can't stop it. I don't know why. I guess I still get scared sometimes that I might lose him and my heart will get broken all over again- and that's the worst pain ever. So I ask him questions until he gets violent, but I don't do it because I want to start a fight with him, I do it because I want to make sure that things are okay with him and us.So this week I kept mentioning breaking up with him almost everyday until on Friday afternoon I said it with such sincerity (as he put it) that we really did...for a few hours. So then we decided we just needed some time apart but we wouldn't break up. Every time I would talk about breaking up in the past he would always ask if we would still be friends and I would say no. Because I don't want to hear who he's going out with or whatever. But on Friday after I broke up with him I realized I did want to stay friends with him, but that wouldn't work because we'd probably just get back together again anyway, I feel it, and he knows it which is why he always asked to stay friends. So we're still together, we're still in love, but I agree that living apart from each other for a while will do ME good. I want to feel that trust I haven't felt in a year, because I have no idea where it went and hopefully with him gone it will come back. God, I hope so, more than anything!So this is our plan for the next 5 months:Jeff- Savannah College of Art and Design, Majoring in Sound Design, FreshmanVeronica- Because I'm a cheap bastard when it comes to giving $-hungry schools my $, I will attend FIU or FAU as a non-degree seeking student and take at least 12 hours of art classes that I need as pre-requisites at SCAD, saving my dad thousands of dollars. In December I will move to Savannah where I'll be --->Veronica- Savannah College of Art and Design, Majoring in Film, Junior. I've already registered at FIU, but to avoid bumping into old acquaintances I wouldn't mind driving 40 minutes to Boca Raton. Right now Jeff is in Savannah looking for a studio apartment and then he's off to Hardy, AR to see his mom. We will meet up again the end of August because he will be helping me film a few shorts to beef up my portfolio.I hope everything works out between us. The other day he told me he has never loved anyone as much as he loves me while crying. And I admitted to him that I have never done so much for one person as I have for him. He keeps me alive and I want him in my life forever.

Where ...

Where can I find Japanese magazines here in Miami? Specifically Japanese fashion magazines? I haven't even looked around. I'm guessing the independent bookshops on South Beach might have. I used to go to Worldwide News on NE 163rd to buy weird foreign mags, they might sell. Anyone know? And I know I've been neglecting two certain individuals who are very dear to me. But I can't go anywhere until I finish this thingie I have to do. Which will be soon, I promise. And when I do finish we will all go to Off 5th to shop. Then we can all drive around and go into every Asian shop in the area from Homestead to West Palm, where hopefully we will find at least one CUTIE, JUNIE, JILLE, or NON-no magazine, DAMMIT!Speaking of cutie, I miss this one. My sisters' boys nephews are adorable. Is that right, sisters' boys?